You’re special!

I might have 100 or so friends on here (MySpace), but as I started to write this, I began to feel it is something a bit more personal and I didn’t want to share with just anyone. Therefore, if you’re reading this, I picked you out for one reason or another — whether it’s because you subscribe to my blog, you’ve left a comment here once or twice or I just trust you enough with something as personal as this entry. Thanks for reading.

The Tooth and Nothing But the Truth

It happened in a flash. It’s a moment that changed many things. Recalling it opens my mind to the ideas of regret and alternate realities. And that dreaded question that plagues us all from time to time — what if?

I have never really been a sports guy. I remember watching baseball with my dad while playing with Star Wars figures. As I watched the screen, I thought to myself, “How is this better than cartoons?” I guess I never grew out of that. Later in my early teens, I saw something in my favorite store at the time, The Sharper Image, that would change my life. What I saw was a strange, new kind of roller skate. The first Rollerblades had just been released and I was determined to have them. After repeated begging, my parents buckled and I got my black and neon yellow skates. I was ecstatic. Back in 1990, I was probably one of the first people ever to rollerblade to school.

Fast-forward many years later. Hockey. After playing in random parking garages and being kicked out of school tennis courts, my friends and I decided to form a team and join a league. While gathering the hundreds of dollars of appropriate equipment we were told they were currently out of helmet cages that protect the face. So, I played without a cage, as did the majority of my team. What happened on the fourth game of our first season shattered me in more ways than one. I remember sliding in to steal the puck and noticing that I was a few seconds too late. His hockey stick was already cocked and on its way down from a powerful slap shot. Then there was an explosion. I regained my thoughts enough to know I was alone laying on my side. My first thought was something wasn’t right with my face. Then I saw them – tiny white pieces scattered on the floor — I recognized them for what they were and would never be again. Immediately I put a hand to my mouth to discover my smile was no longer.

My two front teeth were destroyed. After 7 years of bone graft surgery, root canals, temporary fake teeth, a mismatching crown setback, braces for the second time, crowns falling out, loose teeth, multiple retainers, thousands of dollars, oodles of pain, and the most terrible of nightmares — it’s still not over. Today I met again with my oral surgeon and looks like my original root is either cracked or dying. My tooth has to be completely replaced. I thought I was prepared to hear this, but when he told me, I was devastated. It feels like I’m back to square one. So beginning in June, the months of multiple doctor visits, surgeries, and worry begin all over again. I feel a bit selfish feeling so down about this when so many others have much worse problems. I guess I just hoped this was all behind me. So if all goes well, by Christmas I’ll have my two front teeth. haha. (sigh)


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